Moisturizer and Meltdowns: Why Caregivers Skip Skincare (and How to Stop)
Jun 18, 2025
If you're anything like me, you've stood in the bathroom at the end of a long day—maybe one filled with therapies, meltdowns, paperwork, and reheated coffee—and thought, "I should wash my face."
And then you didn’t.
Because when you're caregiving around the clock, the basics of self-care can feel like luxuries. But here’s the truth: skipping skincare isn’t just about dry skin. It’s a sign that you’re running on fumes. And that matters.
Let’s talk about why caregivers skip skincare—and how we can gently, realistically, bring it back.
- Skipping Becomes the Default When You’re in Survival Mode
When everything in your house feels urgent—from appointments to school emails to calming a meltdown—something as “small” as moisturizer can feel like it doesn’t matter.
But here’s the thing: skincare is not vanity. It’s regulation.
It’s one of the few moments you get to touch your own body without doing it for someone else. It’s a cue—a quiet reminder that you’re still in there somewhere.
When we skip it night after night, it’s not just about neglecting our skin. It’s about neglecting our nervous system. That 60-second face wash? It might be the one time you exhale.
- Your Skincare Routine Can Be a Cue System
If you’ve followed me for any length of time, you know I’m all about cue systems—visual, physical, or environmental prompts that take the mental load out of decision-making.
Guess what? A skincare routine can be a cue system for winding down.
It’s one of the few habits that uses all three elements of a good cue system:
- Visual: the bottle on the sink
- Tactile: the texture on your skin
- Sequential: cleanse → moisturize → rest
If you set it up with intention (and permission to keep it simple), skincare becomes part of the rhythm that helps your body shift from go mode to rest mode.
- Don’t Skip It—Adapt It
This isn’t about guilt. This is about reimagining self-care so it fits inside your life, not outside it.
Here’s what works for me (and maybe for you too):
- Simplify the steps: One gentle cleanser and a moisturizer. That’s it.
- Make it visible: Keep them on the counter, not hidden behind the cabinet door.
- Pair it with an anchor habit: Right after brushing teeth or turning off the kitchen light.
- Let it be messy: You don’t have to do it “right.” You just have to do it.
Some nights, the win is washing your face. Other nights, it’s swiping on moisturizer with a baby wipe in the dark. Both count.
The Bottom Line: You Deserve the System, Not Just the Scraps
Skincare isn’t shallow. It’s sacred.
It’s not about perfect skin—it’s about a tiny system that puts you back into your own story.
Because when you care for your face, even briefly, you’re saying:
“I matter, too.”
And when you believe that? It changes how you show up—not just for them, but for you.
👉 Want systems that support you just as much as your family?
Come join the free Facebook group:
Parent Caregivers: Productivity for Real Life
We talk cue systems, survival mode strategies, and how to build a home that works for everyone.
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